I believe most of you had seen this before.
But anyway, I think it's still as funny as ever. Enjoy~ xD
______British English vs Malaysian English______
Who says our English is teruk? Just see below---
ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to-point, effective, etc:
When giving a customer bad news
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Malaysians: No stock.
Returning a call
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hello, who page?
Asking someone to make way
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-kew me
When someone offers to pay
Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Malaysians: No-need, lah.
When asking for permission
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
Malaysians: (pointing the door) can ar?
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.
Malaysians: Don't be shy, lah!
When doubting someone
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?
When declining an offer
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Don wan la...
In disagreeing on a topic of discussion
Britons: Err..Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.
Malaysians: You mad, ah?
When asking someone to lower their voice
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate over here.
Malaysians: Shaddap lah!
When asking someone if he/she knows you
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time...Do I know you?
Malaysians: See what? See what?
When assessing a tight situation
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of predicament at the moment.
When trying to find out what had happened
Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?
Malaysians: What happened why lidat??? Adui!!!
When someone did something wrong
Britons: This is not the way to do it, here let me show you.
Malaysians: Like that oso duno how to do!!
When someone piss you off
Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me?
Malaysians: Celaka u/cibai
Another joke about English......
had a good laugh? i hope you do! xD